I hate running.

On days like today (or should I say yesterday, now that it’s an obscene time of the night), I hate running. Which is a worrying realisation to have, when my training plan for the Cambridge and Berlin half marathons should be in full swing. I don’t always hate running, but the pressure of a training plan, and now a time goal (which I have set myself) are building up, and I think I’m just getting anxious about failing. I read somewhere that failure is one of people’s biggest fears in the modern world, and I think I’m definitely a victim of that. Posts like this came from fear of failure. Leaving things to the last minute and then hoping they turn out as best they can when rushed. That is not how I’m going to achieve my sub 2.15 goal for Berlin. No sir-ee.

On the bright side, I wasn't running in a desert...

Today’s run made me doubt myself completely. Despite Wednesday’s wonderful happy running joy, this one just didn’t cut the mustard. From the beginning everything seemed to be against me. The wind was blowing me over, patches of drizzle served to further dampen my already sour mood, I couldn’t find an even pace so I kept having to stop… it was all just bad. To make it worse, the more I thought about how badly I was running, and how this was not a run on the way to sub 2.15 greatness, the worse the run seemed to get. It wasn’t until I forgot myself, and let my mind drift to my Team Bangs on the Run 2 training, that I slipped into an almost comfortable run. Too bad it was in the last ten minutes as I raced myself home, back to my sofa.

I know that I don’t really hate running. I know that running can be euphoric, exhilarating, and enjoyable. So I’m going to take the advice of a fellow runner, Shameek of Run Dem Crew and get myself back out there. The only way to get over a bad run, is to get out running again.

Let’s make this one a good one.

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3 comments

  1. steffi · January 22, 2012

    OMG I wish we could train together 😦
    I do not have a passion for running but we could bust out some killer workouts at the gym…. even a good soundtrack doesn’t help motivate me enough …

    any chance you want to stay at mine next weekend in London and come to this with me? 🙂
    http://www.b-fitexpo.co.uk/

    • MizzBusby · January 22, 2012

      Ahh I know, it would be good if someone wanted to come running in notts… other than the crazy super speedy athletics club, I have no one 😦
      I’m fine to run once I’m in my groove, its just a matter of GETTING into my groove! I’ll have a look at tickets but I doubt it dear 😦

  2. steffi · January 22, 2012

    Yeah. It’s definitely hard getting back into it. I think it takes a solid 2 – 3 weeks of effort before you mentally get over the hating on it part 😛 I hate having to train up to enjoying it though … being unfit so does not help … running is a lot more enjoyable when you’re fit and not dreading having to put one foot in front of the other … but stick with it. It’s worth it 🙂

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